Natal...

Este natal foi especial,
Vai ser o meu último durante os próximos dois anos,

Dois anos sem estar ao pé da minha família e dos meus amigos,
Dois anos em que tudo e todos vão mudar,
Dois anos em que sou capaz de voltar e nem sequer reconhecer aqueles que conheço tão bem,
Os meus melhores amigos... os meus 'tesourinhos'....
A minha família... o meu apoio constante,

Para o ano começo uma nova aventura,
Aventura que me vai levar ao outro lado do mundo,
Ver coisas novas, conhecer uma cultura completamente diferente da minha,
Viver uma vida diferente,
Deixar para trás tudo que conheço e tudo que sei,
Tudo que me é familiar,

Talvez aproveito agora o tempo que tenho com eles ao máximo,
Não sei como vão ser as coisas quando voltar,
Quero saber que vou sair daqui sem querer pôr nem tirar nada do que fiz ou disse,

Os meus amigos e a minha família são tudo que tenho,
Sei que nada nem ninguém vai conseguir alterar isso,
Sei que vão estar sempre aqui para quando precisar deles,

Em momentos mais tristes penso sempre neles,

E antes que acabe este ano,
Deixo-lhes aqui isto escrito para que saibam o quanto penso neles...

Just like everyday... today i thought about a million things... ironic as u used to say "dont think to much, its bad for you",
Well maybe it is... but thats just the way i am,
Not one day passes without me thinking of you,
Yes you,
I know that after all this time things should have changed, and they have... but in so many ways u cant or wont understand some things still remain the same and wont change,
The fact that i write these things about u just goes to show in a way that there is trully one thing that will never change... and thats the fact that u will always be on my mind, no matter what,
For all the things we have gone through and all the things that we still have to go through,
Things will never go back to normal as long as we keep this up... the worst thing is that u know that too,
But who will have the courage to take the first step?
Who's going to be the one to admit to all those things that we know are still to be said and done?
Is it true that the past soon catches up with u?
If so... whats going to become of us?

Where u once stood, is now a whole in my heart,
Where u once stood, there is a space that very few or none will be able to take,
Where u once stood, is a place i'll keep as urs for as long as i need,
Where u once stood, stands a soul that needs u,
Where u once stood, is me.... waiting for the past to catch up with me...

The first one....

In my own words how can i tell u what i think or feel?
In my own words things seem so much harder to say,
In my own words somethings wouldnt even be said,
In my own words how can i make sense of things if I dont even understand them?

How do you know how to put things in my own words, when u daren't even whisper them?!
How do I know what to say to these things in my head?

So many questions and yet after all this time I still havent found the answer to them....

I know the past soon catches up with u... i'm living proff of that...
I know that sooner or later i'll have to face up to alot of things i've been ignoring till now,
But the will power to ignore u seems to be fading....
Just one question... whats going to happen next?